Discreet thoughts.
of hope and dispare
I've vowed that my life is dark and light, and at times grayish.
what if the grayish- simply the less vibrant is what I make it.
a scary thought

My world is feeling- emotion. lack of it drives to insanity.
I seek out any form of feeling, even if it be pain.

He shook them (young women) off his back like a young stallion shaking off an unskilled rider —Russell Banks
Push her away like a clinging dog —Daphne du Maurier
Swept her aside as if she were a cobweb —Susan Kelly

rejection

A horrid feeling. but one non the less.
It pains, but I feel.
I want an arise from people.
I get one.
like a child in a deep hole looking up through the never-ending tunnel.
small, hopeless, worth little-nothing.